[joke]debian-->ubuntu-->linuXXX

galilette

原文：http://mail.nl.linux.org/humorix/2004-11/msg00002.html

[humorix] The Hottest New Distribution: LinuXXX

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    * Subject: [humorix] The Hottest New Distribution: LinuXXX
    * From: James Baughn <jbaughn@xxxxxxx>
    * Date: Tue, 23 Nov 2004 21:17:59 -0600
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The Hottest New Distribution: LinuXXX
November 23, 2004


LAS VEGAS -- Described as the world's first
"pornographic  operating system," a new Linux
distribution called LinuXXX was unveiled earlier today at
a press conference in the lobby of a Las Vegas hotel.
Sales of the distro have been... well, hot.


"Why didn't I think of this?" said a Linux groupie who
waited in line to purchase a limited edition LinuXXX
boxed set (with discreet brown paper bag) for $69.95.
"This will be the perfect addition to my bachelor pad of
doom."


The co-creator of LinuXXX, Eric Hefner, said that the
inspiration for the all-porn OS came from the Ubuntu
Linux distribution. "When Ubuntu revealed their original
cleavage-enhanced splash screen, I knew the world was
ready for a Triple-X operating system."


But LinuXXX contains much more than scandalous splash
screens and desktop wallpaper.  A special kernel module
implements a stealth TCP/IP stack called ARMCHAIR (Adult
Reading Material Completely Hidden Advanced Interface
Regulator) that makes it possible to download
pornographic material over a  public network without
detection.


"ARMCHAIR uses steganography to embed the... um...
content inside legitimate HTTP traffic," Hefner
explained.  "A packet sniffer would think you were
accessing Google, when in fact you were downloading
from... well, I don't want to reveal my favorite source."


Another important feature is the PANIC mode (also called
the WIFE mode), which will immediately hide anything
incriminating from the filesystem and memory when the
user hits a certain key combination.   "Since this is a
kernel-level feature," Hefner said, "It can fool commands
like df into thinking that the /usr/porn folder is
actually /usr/lib.  Until you enter the right password,
absolutely all traces of you-know-what will be
invisible."


With 10,000 copies sold in the first week, LinuXXX has
already surpassed the market share of Slackware 1.0.  But
while the future looks very bright, some pessimists are
pessimistic.


"Once Linux and open source developers get ahold of this,
they won't have time for hacking anymore," said a
pundit.   "Any operating system that lets you type
'porn-get install boobies' is going to be a serious drain
on productivity, which could cripple the entire free
software movement and hand Bill Gates yet another
victory.  We can't let that happen."


However, not everybody is worried about this threat. Said
one early LinuXXX adopter,  "This kind of innovative
software actually lengthens my... er... attention span
and increases my productivity. I can have Hot Babe[1]
open in one xterm while programming in another. That's
the beauty of multitasking..."


Everybody else who has installed LinuXXX was, for obvious
reasons, unavailable for comment at press time.


Cody "EEDOK" Hollis-Perdue contributed to this report.


[1] http://dindinx.net/hotbabe/index.php


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